On Teaching

"The Yoginīs Of Uḍḍiyāna In Meditation 1"

Teaching Tantra is something of an paradox to me, and I don’t think it can actually be done.

Tantra is both a philosophy and a means to realization.

Classical Tantra is a philosophy that is supported by a system of practices that enables one to realize a specific goal: embodied liberation. In practice, I find that it is, first and foremost, a way of living, a way of being. The goal of Classical Tantra is to immerse so deeply within the moment that you recognize that the true nature of this very moment is “your” true nature, and that, in fact, there is only ever this one true nature. This is a paradoxical process: you center firmly within and all of a sudden, you discover that there is no without, and thus, you are All That Is. A single point turns into the whole universe. ​You are One. Or rather, One Is.

On a conceptual level, all these things can be taught.

Classical Tantra has a very elaborate philosophy, countless texts and scriptures explore every aspect of the awakening process and of liberation. There are literally hundreds of practices, some more elaborate than others, there are dozens of deities, each complete with their ritual worship. One can spend hours reading and interpreting texts, exploring practices, “learning” – and yet not take a single step towards awakening.

"Light On Tantra"

Awakening cannot be “taught”.

It is a deeply personal, very embodied process that is simultaneously completely universal. The teachings, while helpful initially, must be completely absorbed, first by the mind and then by the body (or the other way round, doesn't really matter). They have to be turned into one’s very being, and then discarded completely if any realization is to happen. This is a problem, if not the problem on this whole path:

The teachings are not actually teaching what the student wants to be taught.

Teachers of any spiritual path face the problem that all they can ever do is point towards something they feel would be helpful next steps on a student’s path, and pray that the student notices where they are pointing, instead of simply looking at the finger. It can be very frustrating. The student wants to be taught awakening, but by their very nature, teachings are not suited to actually teach awakening. I think they should be called “pointings” instead of teachings, as that better describes them.

Pointings can only teach students where to look.

And yet, apparently, some people are skilled at this and manage to catch their student’s attention for just long enough that the student begins looking in the right direction, or if they are very lucky, actually seeing. Then, all the teacher does is show the next signposts along the way. Once the student knows where to look, the walking almost happens on its own. The signposts, then, are what makes the awakening process universal.  The steps the student takes are what makes it deeply personal.

The fact that the goal of Tantra cannot actually be taught is the main reason I have never sought to “teach” - despite sensing that this is where I might end up. If I “teach” Tantra, I am actually misleading the (potential) student into thinking that this is what the goal is. When starting on the Tantrik path, the student doesn’t yet have the discernment to recognize that this is the case, so for the purpose of actualizing the goal of the path, this is quite a dangerous thing to do. It leads the student astray and adds to their load of things (concepts, ideas, stories) that need to be undone in order to be able to realize the goal of the path.

Over the past months and years, I have repeatedly and regularly found myself “doing” exactly that. But, by some miraculous Grace, I feel that there is a kind of built-in rescue mechanism in teaching, at least when I find myself in that position.

"The Yoginīs Of Uḍḍiyāna In Meditation 2"

Teaching is not something that can be actively “done”.

When “teaching” happens in this body-mind, it is something that is beyond anything “I” actively “do”. I find myself with other people, they say something, a response speaks through my mouth. I do not know what I will say, I do not know where the words come from. Yet, they arise, and, judging from the recipients’ reactions, they appear to be beneficial. So they say more, and more words arise and after a while, “I” notice that “teaching” is happening. Hence, “teaching” for me most often happens in a way that completely bypasses the mind. It is simply the natural arising of words, triggered by questions and the energy of the people asking those questions. The danger of “me” co-opting the teaching role, of controlling the teaching process, and ultimately of distracting the student by teachings that for them are not necessary, is greatly reduced in this way. It isn’t a foolproof method, but I feel it is the best option available.

Resistance is futile.

And still, for quite some time now, I have been resisting this process, unwilling to encourage students or to jump into the river that is clearly flowing through me. However, at this point on the path, I cannot but go with the flow, literally. And the flow, now, it seems has taken me here. So, I am very honored to make this body-mind available to serve you as best as I can on your awakening journey. Note, though, that I am not at this point a certified teacher in any lineage. I am simply someone a little further along the way, sharing from what I know to be true and what I know from the scripture and my teachers. So after all this explanation, I think the best way to put it is this:

What I “do” is “Sharing Tantra”.

And I'd love for you to practice, study and share with me!